Pelicans have Friday Night Duck and Chips


Another thrilling chapter in the Pelicans playing legacy was completed on Friday night.

The Kelvin Heights Ducks won the toss and asked the Pelicans to bat. This was gladly accepted and we got away to a flyer with Finchy and Fraser batted like they had an appointment to get to. Dippers and others chipped in with cameos to give the Ducks a solid 242 to chase.

The real match highlight was, again, the fantastic meal provided by the management team. Although questions should be asked of how we can order fish & chips and only get chips?

$99 worth of Remarkables Takeaways was way too much and both teams ate well and still had some leftover for the spectators. The nutritional value of the meal was debatable however… as we share fitness staff with Jesse Ryder and John Daley, we got the green light.

A horrific injury to a foundation player and traditional opening bowler Regan ‘9 Slips’, meant we were looking for a replacement opener. Another foundation player, that really should know better bizarrely choose practice in the nets by bowling beamers at a 44 gallon drum and bowling nasty bouncers at 7 year old boys. This decidedly un-Pelican behaviour could not go unpunished and he was handed the new ball to redeem himself. Being the charitable man that he is, he delivered 2 overs that had more rubbish than the Victoria Landfill.

Luckily ‘more swing than Austin Powers’ Dzin bowled a couple of quality spells that set the Ducks behind the run rate. Jane ‘Louisiana’ Evans chipped in with 4 overs of medium pace that were tighter than a Scotsmans pocket.

The lowlight of the fielding performance was the worlds easiest catch being dropped at mid-off by a man that also, conveniently leads the wicket-taking competition. He assured me it was all pure coincidental, but was heavily fined nevertheless. Karma did kick in, twice, later than night.

In the traditional crossing of Horne Creek his athletic attempt to clear it in one leap was undone by landing in shin deep mud and falling backwards into the slimy creek water. However it would get worse for him as he got home at 3.00am to find he had no keys and he ended spending the remainder of the night curled up next to his dog in the kennel.

The Ducks had a huge total to chase and went about their work with admirable enthusiasm and energy. The Pelicans tried some new mid-innings bowling combinations and it proved surprisingly successful with a string of tight overs and wickets that left the Ducks lower order needing over 20 an over. The fielding captain took an unusual approach to setting fields and pressuring the opposition by leaving the field to smoke cigarettes and drink Speights. Unfortunately the Ducks were flustered by this new tactic and the chase became too much for them and they bowed for a battling 140. LP took the final wicket with his first ball for the team and now leads the bowling averages. (please note: He is expressly banned from mentioning it at games ever again, and will be fined heavily should he choose to tell us again, and again, and again…like he did later on Friday night!)

The Pelicans Man of the Match award, the ‘Red Headed Step Child’ was presented ‘in absentia’ to Janey ‘Louisiana Token Greenstone Kid’ Evans.

The Pelicans side will be depleted next week with several players going on a sabbatical to Wellington for the long weekend. Suitably talented replacements have been recruited to fill the void and should contribute well.

Click here to see a Pelican eat a Duck

Remember, Pelicans are the only bird that can rollerblade, but they don’t, because its gay.